meeego

i swear.

2009-07-04T23:32:21Z

This is it. Time is up. Can't say it wasn't worth it though. So thank you! For each and every single moment we shared and mostly, thank you for a second chance.

We made it count.

finale?

2009-07-02T14:00:51Z

Is this it?

We were so different from all the others,
But we weren't perfect either.

On Cab Rides and Mud on your Slippers

2009-06-30T10:34:40Z

A familiar feeling has come to visit. We meet again stranger. Have you come to collect my yearly due?

Sorry, Im giving it much thought.
Until it burns out. Until it burns out.

Can you make this last?

2009-06-27T10:47:46Z

My highest hopes that everything im going through for you would be worth it someday. It's been kinda tough for me recently, but i'll stick it out. I swear, until the day I run out of reasons. Why? Maybe, Just maybe 'cause what i feel may be what I've been looking for all along. This may be it. Just hope that someday you realize how special what we have right now really is. That someday you open up your heart and feel the same way.

Holding on to that piece of time
When it felt right.
Keep me going.
Please.
Keep me going.

I don't wanna have to give us away.
Keep me going.

.

2008-05-30T14:32:57Z

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Do Not Be Coy.

Rush.

2008-05-06T01:24:06Z

    I Have absolutely no idea what in the world brought me to this place. What did I get? A truck load of realizations that Aren't that great in the first place? Doubts about myself that aren't that easy to overcome. And what did I lose? Haha. The life I always dreamed of. And to top it all off, A bestfriend. Well, maybe God has something in store for me other than what I really think I wanted. Maybe all this nonsense and bullshit that has been happening for the past 5 months or so will sooner find its meaning. Maybe there's something greater than the worth of those events. Or maybe karma's the villain here. Haha Yeah. But how? I've been through the "Picking up the litter" and " saving coins for Sunday Mass" with the pure wholeness and goodness in my heart. Or maybe it was me "falling" inlove with my bestfriend when my other bestfriend still wasn't over that person. Explains alot? OR is it really love? Love is too cliche. Oh well, what the fuck. I'm thankfully over now. After being through the worst of hell. I'll just go with the flow. Ride my boat right this time.

    " There is more to life than relationships anyway." Thanks, you know who you are :)

    You just suddenly reappear into my life. And both of us click like clockwork. Well, I hope I forget where this is going. What we have right now is Golden. And I don't want to ruin that. I just need time okay? I wouldn't want to rush things. Hopefully we'll have our chance someday. And I'm gonna do it right this time. All the things I never got to prove. All the things I never got to give since I dreamed of "loving". 'cause we 'll dream together. I promise.

After all the chaos and havoc
There must be something You have planned
Underneath it all.

And the songs I've got left, I'll give them all to you.

2008-04-16T02:12:39Z

I am starting to lead a happier life now. The dreams have kinda stopped. But yeah, maybe there still is a ~~TINY~~ spark left for you. You have obviously moved on. And I decided that maybe I'm not just gonna be stuck down here in a state of nothingness. There's more to life than being in relationships anyway. And I know you've heard quite bad rumors about me. That I have changed. I have. And I know I'm not the same anymore. If you only knew about the illegal things I've been doing. But I expected you to know me more than those rumors. Oh well. If you don't want the friendship back its fine with me. Sorry for the random thought but yeah. I've become too defensive.

Coming across palancas is really. Haha. I don't have the word. I came across yours. " You are one of the people that make me believe that some friendships are worth keeping". That line got me. I'm sorry. I just couldn't finish the whole letter. Well you could forget. Selective memory is the game to play. Avoid getting hurt. I wish I could too. Unfortunately I'm not gifted with the ability to forget. I Have to face everything I know about this world and keep them to myself. So yeah. A few more blogs and I'm going to stop. I just have to get everything I want to say off my chest.

'Cause I saw forever in your eyes
And its not that easy to forget that.

meeego @ 2008-03-30T01:30:00

2008-03-29T17:34:53Z

I just want to wake up
and realize that I just
don't need you anymore.

~~FUCK~~

Don't you get it?
I still love you.

meeego @ 2008-03-26T09:58:00

2008-03-26T04:14:14Z

And when all the glitters of this world have faded
When all the glamour of this world has waded,
I'll always remember this certain girl,
The girl that taught me how to love.

Afterglow was fun! Had a great time! She didn't dance with any guys which makes me the luckiest person last night. Haha. Some guy from la salle got severely drunk and he was sleeping on the road kissing shit :| So we had to carry the jerk inside the clubhouse and splash him with ice. But still he wouldn't come to his senses. What an asshole. So yeah. I still have a debut later. Days are closing in before I leave for cebu. The inevitable. Again.

Sorry for the boring blogs. My wandering mind is still on hold. I promise I'll write something worth the time. I promise.

When everything else is ~~broken~~,
We count the stars
and we carry on

For some odd reason i still believe in what we felt.

2008-03-24T02:07:24Z

    Okay now Harry Potter starts appearing in my dreams. Disturbing :|

    I wake up with the same twisted realization I've been having every morning since we broke up. That it's gone. And a good friend of yours just had to remind me last night. Is there anyone out there sharing the agony? Well yeah I bet there is. I bet there are thousands of us. Sorry for the exaggeration.

    I would like to rant. Rant about how our three years of being best friends turned into one month of chaotic love then everything is broken. I admit. It was my fault. How could you keep up with a guy like that. Even if you were my best friend. I mean, I was asking for a change. I expected more and more. And i was a drama king. What i never got to do was just go home and talk to you simply because i loved you. I wanted what we had to be perfect. I wanted to be sure. But I destroyed everything on the way. And I'm sorry. You were my first girlfriend. And i was a newbie in those sorts of things. You did nothing else but love me. IM SO ~~FUCKING~~ SORRY. And I always ask God why you had to be the girl to teach me that. You still mean that much to me you know. I try to keep my feelings shallow at the moment. I don't wanna be going breaking down in front of everyone. But it gets better everyday. The pain is as if injected with anesthesia that's piling up on my numb skin. But I'll eventually forget.

    Thank God this live journal is only for myself.

You were the dream I thought I'd never have.
And the dream that just had to fade too fast.

If I wasn't meant to love you, Then whats with all these dreams

2008-03-23T17:37:44Z

Okay So I wake up at around 9am the other day. Pausing. And I say to myself. "Fuck, my feelings aren't gone." I have been trying to move on. And I was in subic. I was far far away. But these dreams are like clockwork. Can they just please stop? They make it harder to carry on. I know its over. I'm sure it is. And I'm thankful we can talk again already. I mean, without any awkward notions that is. Its been fine. I honestly wouldn't want to get into anything with you right now cause I know that it just wouldn't be that easy for both of us so yeah, as the saying goes, "Bahala na."

At least all those spiting for misinterpreted reasons are all over. If you were pissed. I was pissed even more times a million. I know those blogs i made that were wrong. "Another Night of Wisteria" and the like. But for those without any trace of bad blood on you? And you still get mad? I mean, FUCK. Well at least its over. I just hope our friendship works for a second time now. We'll make it work. Lets hope for the best. In a sincerely platonic way.

Why do you hate me?
Is it because we loved?

The Golden Ten.

2008-03-23T13:25:06Z

7:16am. awake in the early hours of summer.

    So, its been more or less two weeks into the three month vacation we've been given by the Ateneo and I've still been floating. No direction. No path. No bearing. Suspened in between the horizons of what I wanted and what has happened. But just like time does its magic. I'm finally starting to catch on. My feet are starting to feel the solid gravel and the green grass in this earth again. Reality.

    I guess I've been hovering over the deplorable shock our brilliant lives give us sometimes. In short. My Junior year didn't turn out the way I expected it to be. What started out to be full of priorities and dreams have well, twisted their way out of uniform order.

    But I have realized that truly, everything just has to happen for a reason. Yes I know, some things that happen to us are unwanted, damaged, and even irrepairable. Some things that couldn't be taken back no matter how hard we work for it. Things that we never expect to take course in supposedly the best days of our lives. We try to control. Thinking circumstances would eventually get better. Doing what we assume is best. But sometimes these things are just too inevitable to get a grip of. Later on, we realize that these things were meant to happen because the Almighty wants to enlighten our minds. He wants to teach us.

We learn to love. We learn to let go. We learn to handle.We learn about life. We learn.

    And Believe me, I've discovered fifty times the things Iv'e planned on achieving. Realizations I never thought I would come across. And I am half heartedly thankful for it. I admit that I haven't fully embraced the things that have happened but am starting to realize and appreciate their reasons for taking place in my life.

    Maybe this comes with teenage angst. Or maybe its a preparation for something I may be colliding with in the forthcoming. We never know. Its all a test and a trust that all of us may have to accept someday. We must persevere. Yes, there is still unrelieved pain and regret. That sometimes you wish time could just take you back to a final glimpse of the better days just to relive the strongest emotions that you've felt. The moments where you felt alive. Maybe the first half of last schoolyear? haha. But these are the things that make us stronger. Perhaps these are just presumptions of what we believe we really want but realize that they aren't what is totally essential. Sooner or later, everything would finds its place back and all of us will come out as improved and refined.

    I've been living in this world corrupt with what the youth is supposed to be thinking and doing. But I'm breaking myself free from this chain. I've seen others who have already shattered this cycle of youthful gratification and have taken a giant step into maturity. With pride set aside, I don't want to grow up yet, most of us don't. But there are things that have to happen and will happen. We must face them with everything we've gathered since our childhood as we will ultimately come out as better persons. Dormeurs.

We are all more than what we think we are.

Introduction.

2008-03-23T12:50:52Z

Hello. I'm Migo. Just a random sixteen year old boy battling it through life's quandaries. Never was good with introductions. Lets just say I've recently been intro writing. And the events that have taken place in my life recently have been well, fairly blog worthy. So this is it. Where originality takes its cue. No edited re written entries. No paraphrased song lines. No Bullshit. Just my life.